Contemporary Romance
Date Published: 3/9/2018
Dr. Sarah Buckley is living her dream. After completing her OB/GYN residency, she is now an attending physician with Atlanta Women’s Health Center. Thanks to her bosses, Drs. Lincoln Montgomery and Cole Ryan, she has finally turned her life around. However, she still harbors a deep dark secret that only those closest to her know. Ten years ago, Sarah met the man of her dreams. He was her first everything, first date, first kiss, first lover. After running away from him, he has haunted her dreams as she has tried to avoid him and her secret.
Harrison Cooper has it all, or so he tells himself. All-star third baseman for his beloved hometown Atlanta Braves, multi-million-dollar contracts and women throwing themselves at his feet, but it was the angel who flew away so many years ago that he can’t let go of. He wears the ring that was to be hers as a reminder of the love he has held onto, but all of the searching in the world has not led him back to her.
The birth of his best friend Rhett’s first child finally leads him back to a chance encounter with the one person he can’t forget or stop loving. As her usual actions, she runs away leaving Harrison with a stinging jaw and at a loss for words. Committed to staying with his team until the end, he gambles his future with the new owners for a chance to talk to Dr. Sarah Buckley.
It’s the bottom of the ninth and the bases are loaded for love. Will they strike out or hit a grand slam, or will the secret Sarah’s been harboring tear them apart forever?
This is the third book in the Doctors of Atlanta Series. Come back to share the laughs, tears and love with the gang as Marcie and Cole tie the knot and maybe Harrison and the Braves will finally be winners again…
Excerpt:
CHAPTER FIVE
Sarah awoke with a headache from her lack of sleep. This was going to be a long twenty-four hours. Why had she texted Coop last night? All it did was bring up a tidal wave of emotions that she wasn’t ready to deal with. Instead of a peaceful sleep, she dreamed of what their life would have been like if they had been together. The way that he would ruffle Harry’s hair and teach him how to play ball. What it could be like to watch him hold their daughter’s hand as she went to kindergarten for the first time. Dammit, she had to get out of her head. She went through her morning routine in a bit of a haze and finally started to feel human after her third cup of coffee.
Thankfully, the drive to the hospital was peaceful since she had to be there before the butt-ass crack of dawn for turnover. Luckily for Sarah, it had been a quiet night and there were no pending deliveries she would need to take over. As she finished her morning rounds with the residents, the first indication that her day was going to go straight to hell occurred when a thirty-two-week patient came in screaming in pain and bleeding. So much for an easy day.
Forty-five-minutes and a crash C-section later, Sarah had delivered a relatively healthy baby boy who went to the NICU for monitoring. The mother was in recovery and shouldn’t have any complications. Thankfully she didn’t put off calling an ambulance when she started cramping and bleeding.
“So, Jeremiah. Ready for a quiet day?” Sarah said as they walked out of the operating room.
Jeremiah just shook his head. “If this is quiet, then what’s busy like?”
Sarah laughed. “It should be a good day. Make sure all the discharges are ready to go, but before that, make sure you head down and get something to eat. The patients will be here when you get back and they can’t leave until the pediatrician gives the go ahead to discharge the infants.”
“Thanks, boss.”
Sarah watched as Jeremiah walked away, thankful that she had such a wonderful resident to work with today. Her chief resident was finishing rounds and doling out assignments for the day. The residents and students were usually busy until lunch time, and then their workload tended to slow down depending on which women were ready to have babies. As she walked towards the doctor’s lounge, her phone pinged her with a message. Looking down she smiled when she saw the message.
H: Thanks for last night. I’m glad we got to talk. I hope you have a great day.
S: You’re welcome. I really enjoyed our chat. Hope you have a great day as well. I’m on call today and will be here until tomorrow morning.
H: Yikes. I thought my schedule was crazy at times with all the travel, but I give it to you for doing twenty-four hours in a row.
Sarah was enjoying her texting when her pager went off alerting her to a new patient.
S: Sorry, Coop. Duty calls. Gotta run. Maybe I’ll catch you later.
H: Have a great day and good luck with the patients.
Sarah ran to the labor and delivery suite where a mother-to-be had waited a little too long to come to the hospital and was already crowning when she stepped up to the foot of the bed. “Okay, Mrs. Martin. No time for an epidural. Time to push and get that baby out.”
Sarah looked down at her watch. She thought it would be nice if all deliveries could be twenty minutes or less. Sarah walked over to the nurses’ station to finish her paperwork and round up her residents and students. She hoped the first three hours of her day were not an indication of the next twenty-one. She made sure all the discharges were signed and the patients were ready to go before handing out assignments for the rest of the day. She was about to leave when her favorite OR nurse Elisha appeared at her side. “Hey, E. What’s up today? Thanks for all your help this morning during that crash C-section.”
“No problem. That’s what I’m here for. I was wondering if you had a few minutes so that I could pick your brain? I’m in the middle of my nurse midwife classes, and I could use some help.”
“Sure. Let’s go to the doctor’s lounge and grab some coffee while we talk.”
Sarah and Elisha walked into the doctor’s lounge to find a place to talk. After walking in, Elisha saw Jeremiah sitting off to the side and blushed at her memories of him.
Sarah noticed the blush creep up the cheeks of her favorite nurse and looked across the room to see Jeremiah sitting there with his head in a book. She wondered what the story was between them, and hoped that they would have time to discuss it before they left. Sitting down with her coffee, Sarah said, “So, what can I help you with?”
“It seems that no matter what I do, and how hard I study, I can’t seem to get the grasp of the management of late term vaginal bleeding. When do you decide to initiate an emergency C-section vs conservative management.”
“Wow. You don’t ease into anything do you. Okay, so here are the general guidelines that I use. The key to management is the use of ultrasound (US). The US will tell you if the bleeding is due to a placental abruption where the placenta has detached from the uterine wall or whether there is a placental cyst that has a blood collection. Also, history is a big indicator. If a patient had early bleeding and the diagnosis of the cyst is present then it helps to decide your course of action. Also, the degree of placental detachment can clue you into whether you need a crash C-section or not. Typically, I will do a C-section if there is a detachment, but strong active bleeding indicates the emergency. Otherwise we can do a more controlled C-section with fewer post-op complications. If you like, we can pull some old cases and look at the US and case history.”
“Oh my God. Thank you. When you explain it like that, it seems so simple. You’re already one of my favorite docs, so let me know if there is anything I can do for you.”
“Well, actually. What’s the deal with you and Jeremiah? I couldn’t help but notice the blush you developed when you saw him, and the glances he kept stealing over here when he thought I wasn’t looking.”
“God, this is kind of embarrassing,” Elisha whispered, I used to dance at the Cheetah to help pay for grad school. I disguised my look but couldn’t hide my eyes. Well, the guys were all there for Lincoln’s bachelor party and Jeremiah was reeling from a bad break-up. Cole recognized me and talked to me about my second career choice. He and Lincoln asked me to quit with the understanding that they would pay for my program, then I would work for them for a period-of-time. Anyway, they wanted to do something special for Jeremiah and well during that time we hit it off. I didn’t tell him who I was, but then the next Wednesday he was in my OR and he recognized me. Since then, he has flirted a little bit, but he seems too skittish to do anything about it. So, if you could give him a nudge my way, I would appreciate it.”
Sarah smiled. “I’ll see what I can do. What you just told me cemented all the reasons I respect and love Cole and Lincoln. So, since we’re having girl talk, wanna know my big secret. I don’t want to burden you, but I could use woman’s perspective.”
“Anything for you.”
“I have a son who’s nine almost ten. He doesn’t know who his father is and his father doesn’t know that he has a child. It’s a long, complicated story, but when we were dating everything was great, but he was my first everything including relationship. I didn’t trust in his love and I think I believed the words of a worthless tramp and ran away. I didn’t find out I was pregnant until later and never told him. Now, I’m confronted with seeing his father again and I don’t know what to do. I think I made a huge mistake, but I know that when he finds out about Harry he’s going to flip his shit and hate me.”
“Yikes. Do you mind if I ask who the father is?”
“You can’t say anything to anybody. I mean only a few people know who he is, and it would unfortunately create a media storm that I don’t want Harry dragged into the middle of. You swear you will take this to the grave or at least until it becomes public?”
“I swear. I would never break your trust.”
“His father is Harrison Cooper.”
“Oh my God. You mean the Braves all-star third baseman?”
“Yes.”
“Holy shit.”
“Yeah. Holy shit. So, you can see my dilemma. The worst part is that I’m still in love with him. I haven’t seen him in ten years - until his best friend’s baby was born - and since Nicole went into what she thought was labor, I ended up doing the delivery. After I delivered the baby, I was standing by the nurses’ station when he approached me. I did the only thing I could think of. I slapped him and ran away. Which is ironic, as that was what happened the last time I saw him.”
“Just out of curiosity, what did the tramp say to you?”
“She told me that she was Harrison’s baby momma which meant that he would have had to have been with her when he was with me.”
“Ouch. I can understand why you would’ve been upset. What did he say to you afterwards?”
“Nothing. I never gave him a chance.”
“Why do you think it’s coming to a head?”
“When he signed his new contract, he made a stipulation that we would have a sit-down meeting as part of the contract. I could’ve said no, but I feel like I owe Lincoln and Cole so much that I couldn’t say no. So, we have a meeting on January 4th and Lincoln and Cole have agreed to act as mediators should I want them there, but honestly, I just want to hear him out. Also, since seeing him, I’ve been drawn more and more back towards him that I can barely control myself. We’ve texted a few times at night. I get the feeling he still cares for me, but I know that will end when he finds out about Harry.”
“So, are you going to tell him at your meeting?”
“Maybe. I want to hear what he has to say then take some time to think about how to tell him. I need a good plan especially if I have made the biggest mistake of my life.”
“Well, good luck. If you need me for anything just let me know.”
“Thanks. I’ll do that.”
Just as Sarah finished, her pager went off alerting her to another patient’s arrival. She looked over at Jeremiah and said, “Come on Jeremiah. Enough studying for now. Let’s go do some practical application of that book knowledge you are gaining.” Sarah was happy to see Jeremiah smiling again. She remembered when he was going through his personal hell in the spring. So far, he seemed to be thriving in the program.
“So, are you going to ask her out?”
Jeremiah’s head shot up, momentarily confused by the question. “Pardon?”
“Elisha. Are you going to ask her out? She’s a great person and I think you two would have a lot of fun.”
“Oh. I hadn’t thought about it very much.”
“I’m going to call bullshit on that one. You couldn’t stop staring at her when you thought we weren’t paying attention.”
Jeremiah began to stammer and stutter as he looked for the right words.
“I’m going to stop you right there. There’s no reason to not ask her out. She won’t turn you down, and I don’t mean because she’s easy. I mean that she would be receptive to your asking.”
Thankfully, Jeremiah was saved as they walked into the exam room to find an expectant mother of twins deep into the labor process.
“Crap. What is it with people waiting so long to get to the hospital today?” Sarah looked over the chart quickly before stepping up to the bedside. “Well, Mrs. McAllen. Cutting it a little close, today aren’t we?”
“Well, at least I made it to the hospital this time.” she said with a grimacing laugh in between contractions.”
“So, you’re 36 weeks which is good for twins. Your contractions are five minutes apart, and…wait…what? This time?”
“Yeah, last time I made it as far as the front lawn of the hospital.”
Sarah laughed before quickly examining her, “Well, at least you made it all the way this time. You’re fully dilated. It shouldn’t be long now.”
Sarah brought Jeremiah over to the foot of the bed. She introduced him to the McAllen’s and then worked to help him deliver a set if healthy twins. After ensuring the twins were on their way to the NICU for monitoring, Sarah helped Jeremiah finish his paperwork, and signed off on the live births.
“Wow. That was just wow, Dr. Buckley. That was awesome. I can’t believe that I just delivered twins.”
“Good job Jeremiah. That was fun. Not as exciting as my first twins which were delivered to a twelve-year-old. That was a whole lot of screaming and drama. The mom stood over to the side and kept saying, ‘I don’t know how this could’ve happened.’ I mean, I nearly lost it laughing at the woman, because we all know how it happened, she just didn’t want to acknowledge her precious daughter was doing the nasty at twelve.”
Jeremiah laughed and thought about how lucky he was to be on Dr. Buckley’s service. She was helping him to learn and practice his craft in a manner that was not too judgmental. “Thank you for allowing me to perform the delivery.”
“You’ve earned it. You can’t spend all your time writing discharge orders and checking on floor patients. Unfortunately, we can’t spend too much time chatting away since we have an induction scheduled at one-thirty and a C-section scheduled at two. Hopefully the induction will progress normally, but only time will tell. I want you to scrub in with Dr. Jones for the C-section. I’ll be there to observe so don’t worry. Just head back to the doctor’s lounge and make sure you’re ready for the procedure. Also, make sure you check her pre-op labs, introduce yourself to the patient and get some lunch. Always remember to eat when you can. Meet me at the nurses’ station at one-fifteen and we will start the induction before the C-section.”
“That sounds great. Thank you for your teaching and understanding, and about the other, I’ll think about it. I’d like to ask her out, but honestly I’ve only ever been with one person and I was not the smoothest in asking her out to start with.”
Sarah walked down the hall taking her own advice as she headed to the doctor’s dining room for some lunch. As she dug into her lunch, her phone pinged with a text message. She was happy to see a message from Harrison, but was surprised to see an image pop-up which was a shirtless picture of him hitting baseballs. Wow that man had filled out nicely. He was always nice to look at and touch when they were dating but that extra time in the weight room has added some nice muscle.
S: Nice. Glad you have to wear a shirt when you play though otherwise it would be too distracting to the females in attendance.
H: Thought you might like to see me at work. I mean I wouldn’t complain about a topless picture of you working, but I’m sure they frown upon that in the hospital.
S: You have no idea. ;)
Sarah sat there for a second and decided what the hell. She grabbed her phone and took a selfie, before sending it to Harrison.
S: Like what you see Coop? The official doctor coat is sexy. Unfortunately, the scrubs aren’t as flattering as they are on TV.
H: I like. I think I’ll make this my new screen-saver.
Sarah chuckled. She had been a lot of things but outside of her mother, she didn’t think she had been anyone’s screen-saver before.
S: Desperate much?
H: It would seem only for you. How is your day going?
S: Busier than I hoped it would be, but it makes the time pass quicker. Do you do anything besides work-out all day long?”
H: I have a visit to Scottish Rite this afternoon to visit with the kids. Rhett and I go about once a week. We keep it low key because we don’t do it for the media attention.
Sarah felt her heart melt a little more thinking of Harrison giving his time so freely to the children. She was saddened to think how angry he would be knowing he had missed out on ten years of his child’s life. Ten years he could never get back. She fought back the tears forming in her eyes and decided she couldn’t keep talking anymore. This was starting to rip her apart even more.
S: Have fun. I’m sure they will enjoy your visit. I have a patient and a resident waiting for me. Talk to you soon.
H: Hope the rest of your day goes well. Bye
Sarah, sat there staring at her phone and didn’t hear Cole sit down beside her.
“So, this is going to be harder than you ever thought.”
Sarah jumped at his words startled back to reality. She wiped away the tears that had escaped. “How did you know I was talking to him?”
“You had this dreamy look on your face like a young woman in love. Then it changed to utter sadness and devastation. I don’t know what he said, but it sure seemed to kill the mood.”
“He said he was going to Scottish Rite to visit the kids today with his best friend, and they keep it low key so the media doesn’t know that they’re there. It made me think about how angry he was going to be about Harry and how much time he had lost.”
“Then maybe it’s time to rip the band-aid off so to speak and tell him.”
“I can’t yet. I still have so many questions that need to be answered, and I need time to prepare Harry. Hopefully, when we meet for our sit-down after the New Year I’ll have a better picture of what to do.”
“No matter what, just remember, we’re here for you.”
“Thanks. Gotta run though, I have an induction and a C-section waiting for me. By the way, I heard about what you did for Elisha and Jeremiah. I think you are a wonderful person. I encouraged him today to take the leap and ask her out. I don’t know what’ll happen, but hopefully he’ll take that next step.”
“They’re both good people, as are you Sarah. Don’t beat yourself up over what happened ten years ago. I know better than anyone you can’t change the past.”
“Thanks, Cole. See you later.” Sarah got up and left the dining room making a beeline for the restroom to try and wash away the evidence of her near breakdown from her face. Gathering her emotions, she left the restroom and headed back to the delivery suites. Sarah needed to get control of herself, not only because she needed to be on top of her game for the patients, but because she had to remain strong. She knew with each passing day that she had made a horrible mistake, and every conversation she had with Coop just reinforced those feelings. Surely in the years she had cyberstalked him she would have read about a wife or a child, because he wasn’t the type of guy that would abandon his family. Finally reaching the doors to the delivery suites, Sarah pasted a smile on her face so the rest of the world would not know her torment.
Sarah walked up to Jeremiah, who was studying his induction notes, and led him to the patient’s room. Thankfully, she was able to find her professional voice and discuss the procedure with him. Even though she had to do the procedure she wanted Jeremiah to walk the patient through it. After the introductions, she stood back and admired the way that Jeremiah interacted with the patient and her family. He was able to succinctly explain the procedure in a manner that the patient was able to understand. Sarah smiled a genuine smile as she watched her young resident excel.
“Great job, Jeremiah. Anybody have any question? No. Well then let’s get started.”
Sarah watched as the nurses started the IV and then she hung the induction meds. She hoped that this would not be a long labor for this thirty-year-old mother of two. Her exam showed she was already four centimeters dilated. After ensuring the monitors were in place and the nurses were briefed on the procedure she took Jeremiah to the OR to get ready for the C-section.
“Okay, Jeremiah, you will be on the left side of the table and assisting Dr. Jones. He’s very good at this, so just follow his lead. If there’s an emergency I’ll take your place. So, if I tell you to move, then move. No questions asked.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
Sarah laughed. “Please don’t call me ma’am. What is the correct incision for this procedure?”
“Lateral Pfannenstiel.”
“What is your main retractor and what is its purpose?”
“Bladder blade. To protect the bladder from an accidental incision when opening the uterus.”
“What closure will you use?”
“Subcuticular with a three-oh prolene.”
“Great. You are ready to go. Go scrub in and talk to Dr. Jones for a few minutes. I’ll be right behind you.” Sarah stood in the scrub room for a few minutes watching her team interact. Sarah watched as Elisha moved around the room making sure everything was ready, but still occasionally stealing glances at Jeremiah. She thought it was so cute how she flirted with her eyes when she thought no one was watching. It even seemed Jeremiah was playing along and she could tell he was smiling beneath his surgical mask. Sarah walked into the OR and reminded herself to have a talk with Dr. Jones about selection of music since the patients were awake during this procedure. Somehow, she wasn’t sure that Mrs. Adams was going to appreciate bringing her baby girl into the world while listening to Def Leppard. Everything went well and Sarah was impressed with the wound closure by Jeremiah. Sarah walked out of the OR pleased with the performance of her residents.
As Sarah, walked down the hall, she noted the smiles that Dr. Jones and Jeremiah sported. If nothing else, she wanted to make sure they had a good foundation in not only technical skills, but patient care skills as well. Sarah was pre-occupied with her thoughts and missed her phone pinging her. When she reached the nurses’ station she pulled it out and noticed a new text from Coop.
H: Dinner?
Sarah’s heartbeat kicked up a few notches. She just wasn’t ready to face him yet. Although dinner could be quick and she could arrange to have other people around, nope couldn’t do that. Maybe…there just didn’t seem to be a good way around this. Sarah knew she was going to be hungry later and the thought of more hospital food wasn’t exactly tickling her appetite. Then it hit her. She could have Coop bring dinner for her residents and students as well. They could meet him and they could have a little time to talk.
S: 7:30 but you have to bring Maggiano’s for everyone including the nurses and residents.
That she thought, should put an end to it.
H: How many.
Shit that didn’t work out as she thought it would.
S: 20 people.
There. That should do it.
H: Where should I meet you.
S: 2nd floor doctor’s lounge. Beware, you will definitely attract attention here. BTW, how was your visit with the kids?
H: Invigorating. That’s okay. I’ll sign a few autographs and take a few selfies, but I get to eat with you.
S: Fine.
H: Fine. See you at 7:30.
Shaking her head, Sarah finally gave up. She was going to have dinner with Coop and the rest of the staff. At least there would be a buffer and no ability to have a quaint heart-to-heart discussion. Sarah told the nurses and residents about her surprise for them and they lit up like a Christmas tree.
Thankfully, the afternoon went more smoothly, and they didn’t have any more unexpected deliveries. The induction progressed nicely. It seemed the only thing she needed was a kick start into labor, and by six-fifteen she had delivered healthy baby number four. Much to the chagrin of the proud father, it was another little girl they named Emma Grace. Even though Sarah’s mind had been on observing the delivery, her heart continued beating out of her chest waiting for Coop to arrive.
Having finished her paperwork, Sarah made her evening rounds and was walking out of her last patient’s room when Elisha came running up to her.
“Oh my God, Sarah. He’s here.” Elisha said.
“I know. I couldn’t fight seeing him anymore, and he promised Italian for everyone.” Sarah said.
“I’m here all night if you need someone to talk to afterwards.”
“Thanks. Time to face the music.”
Sarah walked around the corner to find a very fine-looking Harrison Cooper standing there smiling and taking selfies with the nurses and residents. She smiled as she looked at him. He looked relaxed and comfortable interacting with everyone. That was the Coop she remembered. She continued to stand there and eye him from head to toe. So, lost in her thoughts, she failed to see Coop walk towards her with his hands raised.
As he got closer, he whispered, “Truce, Sarah. No slapping this time.”
Sarah smiled as she registered the words. Unable to control her response she said, “Not unless you ask me to.” Sarah slapped her hand over her mouth not knowing where that came from. She watched a huge smile blossom on Coop’s face. Crap, where did that come from. Sarah walked over and allowed Coop to hug her and at that moment everything in the world felt right. She remembered exactly how perfectly they fit together.
Harrison was surprised that Sarah came to him like she did, but when his arms went around her, he felt at peace. Like he had finally come home. He knew he couldn’t get too caught up in the moment because they still had a lot to work out. She still smelled of lavender and mint and the scent tickled his nose and started a flood of memories coming back. As not to get too attached, he stepped back and said, “Your dinner as ordered Madame. I hope everyone enjoys their food. They loved me when I called and ordered everything on the menu since I didn’t know what everyone wanted.” Harrison leaned in to Sarah and whispered, “But you sweet Sarah, I remembered to order the chicken parmesan.”
Sarah almost melted into a puddle at the thought of him remembering her favorite Italian dish after all these years. She smiled at Coop and wanted to reach out and touch him, but it was too soon for anything more than a light touch on the arm or shoulder, although as she stood their looking at him, she wanted to climb him like a tree. Sarah had tried to turn off those feelings since she got in trouble and hadn’t found anyone that even tickled her fancy. However, Coop tickled every single fancy, and made her girly parts want to wake from their long dormant state. Resisting as best she could, Sarah finally put her hand on Coop’s arm and led him to the doctor’s lounge so they could get a quiet table and eat.
Coop sat across from Sarah as they ate and decided that Sarah had gotten even more beautiful than she was when they dated. Her narrow hips had gently curved out and her breasts were fuller. He longed to touch her and find out if she was still sensitive in all the same spots. In order to stop himself from doing something stupidly inappropriate, Coop started shoveling food into his mouth savoring each bite. Unfortunately, Sarah was doing the same, but she was making the cutest little moaning noises as she relished each bite. This only served to make Coop harder than steel and definitely not able to get up and move. He continued to eat and think of everything and anything that would solves his problem, but the more she ate the worse it got for him.
“So, did you want to just eat or get to know each other again? I’m good either way.” Sarah said in between bites. “By the way, thanks this food is phenomenal.”
Coop peered into Sarah’s chocolate brown eyes and suddenly her words were lost on him. “Wha…what? I’m sorry. To be honest with you, I was lost in your beautiful eyes. Oh, yeah. Definitely get to know each other again. So how was medical school?”
“Toughest thing I ever did.” Except walking away from you. “It seemed like four years of no sleeping and constant studying. I think I lost twenty pounds in four years.”
“You must have been skin and bones. You never had any extra weight to lose. I have to say though you look quite fetching these days especially in those pink scrubs.”
Sarah blushed. “Well, they definitely look better on me than the guys. How about you, is baseball all it was cracked up to be?”
“Yes and no. I mean I still love playing the game, but the travel, the games every day, and even the offseason training have started to drag on. It is nice knowing now that I’ll finish my career here. I have to tell you though, in all honesty, I didn’t think I was going to make it that first year. You screwed with my head so bad that I couldn’t hit, couldn’t field and well I couldn’t do anything. Somewhere in the middle of the offseason, I was finally able to compartmentalize things and I was able to separate my personal and professional life. After that, it all fell into place and I guess the rest is history. I blew through double A and triple A in a year and finally made it to the majors. In the end, I guess…I guess I’m just tired of being lonely. I don’t go out like I used to with the guys. Hell, I’m almost the old man on the team now. It’s tough being surrounded by these young kids who think a strip club buffet meets all the daily requirements for nutrition.”
Sarah wanted to laugh, well did laugh, but was horrified that she was the cause of his troubles. If he only knew the troubles she went through that first year. They would pale in comparison to pregnancy, labor and delivery. Her post-partum depression was monumental. There were so many times she wanted to pick up the phone and call Coop and tell him, but the longer it went on the harder it became. This was going to be more difficult than she thought. “Well, you still made it pretty quickly. Even though I didn’t have much time, I still tried to watch you when I could. You deserved all the accolades you got. I mean Rookie of the Year and All-Star.”
It was Coop’s turn to blush listening to Sarah sing his virtues. “Wow, I don’t know what to say. You watched me and I wondered what you were doing every night. What a pair we made.”
“It’s the past and we need to leave it there for now. How is your family?”
“They’re good. Mom and dad are wonderful. My brother is married with two little girls and my sister is married with a little boy and she just found out she is pregnant with twins. Everyone is ecstatic with the news, and mom can’t wait for more grandchildren. She keeps pestering me about my turn and all, but that’s not happening anytime soon.”
“I bet you’re a great uncle though. You probably spoil them rotten and then leave your siblings to deal with the aftermath.”
Coop smiled, “Yeah, something like that. I remember the first time I got drafted to babysit. Jamie was eighteen months old and Julianna was just three-months-old. I was lost with the whole diaper changing thing. I think more baby powder ended up on the carpet than it did in the diaper. I mean, really what the hell do they feed them for that much poop to come out?”
Sarah snorted tea out of her nose and was bent over double laughing. “Oh my god. I would’ve given anything to have seen that. It would’ve been a live version of Three Men and a Baby.” She struggled to get herself back under control.
“I’m glad you find my troubles so amusing, and don’t even get me started on the spitting up thing. I learned very quickly to not wear nice clothes when I babysat. Okay, enough about my embarrassing situations. I want to ask you something, and I don’t know if I’m prepared for the answer, but here goes. Are you dating anybody? I don’t want to step on anyone’s toes when I’m talking to you and sending you batting cage pics.”
Sarah was a little surprised by the question. She could have lied, but she had done enough of that the last ten years so, in a whisper, she answered truthfully, “No. Honestly, it’s been the furthest thing from my mind - especially this last year. I’ve been so busy with work and then there was this…” Sarah couldn’t believe what she was about to say, but she was saved by her pager going off. “Hold on for a second.” Sarah went over and returned the page. She came back after her call. “Sorry, Coop. I have an emergency and I have to run. I don’t know how long I’ll be so you probably don’t want to wait around. I’ll call you later if you want me to.”
“I certainly understand that I can’t monopolize your time tonight. It’s been a long day so I think I’ll head on home. I would really like for you to call me later. Don’t worry about the time when you call.” Coop stood up and was happy that she accepted his hug and a quick peck on the cheek. If the warm feeling he got from that quick chaste kiss was any indication, his world was going to go into a freefall if he ever got to kiss her like he wanted to do. “Good luck with work, Sarah.”
“Thanks, Coop. Drive safely.”
Sarah walked out to meet her residents and then took them to the patient’s room. The patient was a thirty-two-week gestational age prima-gravida who had gone into labor three hours before. She thought the contractions were Braxton-Hicks and delayed coming in until she felt her water break. Sarah doled out assignments and watched as the team carried them out. She was impressed with their efficiency and professionalism. After the monitors were hooked up, she did a manual exam and felt the head of the baby ready to crown. Sarah called the NICU to get them on standby and to bring an incubator to the delivery room. Given the emergent nature of the delivery and the uncertainty of the condition of the infant, Sarah took charge and performed the delivery allowing Dr. Jones to assist. After thirty minutes of pushing and screaming, a very small baby boy was delivered. At seventeen inches and three pounds six ounces, she allowed the mother to briefly hold the baby before sending him to the NICU. Unfortunately, the drama didn’t end there as the placenta decided to partially remain in the uterus and cause hemorrhaging. They ended up having to rush the patient to the OR for an emergency dilation and curettage (D&C). Sarah had done a lot of things in her training but running down the hall to the OR with her hand and arm inside the patient applying pressure was something she would rather have not been doing.
An hour later, as Sarah finished scrubbing her hands, she smiled due to the fact they ended up having a good outcome without having to do an emergency hysterectomy. Sarah shook her head, suddenly realizing how tired she was. It had been a non-stop day since she arrived and she wanted nothing more than to lie down in the on-call room for a few minutes and wait for the next disaster that would follow her around today. However, as she laid down the only thoughts she was having was that she wanted to call Coop. Fishing her cellphone out of her jacket pocket, Sarah pulled up Coops number and hit dial.
“I was beginning to think you forgot about me.”
“I couldn’t forget about you if I tried. The patient ran into some complications and it took a lot longer than expected. It’s been one of those days, and I was going to lay down for a few minutes, but I’d rather talk to you than rest.”
“I’m honored that you’d rather talk to me. Everything go okay with the patient?”
“In the end, yes. Just not how she imagined her day would go. However, mom and baby are fine. He was premature and will be in the NICU for a little while, but otherwise healthy for his size. I seem to remember your mom telling me you couldn’t wait any longer, and came a few weeks early as well, and we all know how you turned out.”
Coop laughed. “Yeah, I was four weeks early but still almost seven pounds when I came out. I don’t think mom could have handled me at full term.”
“I’m sure she’d have been fine, but I always got the feeling that you were anxious to be places and get things done. Patience was never one of your strong suits. Hence your strikeout numbers a few years ago.”
“Well, what can I say. I finally found my center with yoga. That helped me learn to be more patient and that helped my game.”
“I agree, it seems to have really helped. What are you doing right now?”
“Just sitting out on the veranda drinking some bourbon, smoking a cigar, and thinking about you.”
“Wow, must be really strong bourbon to get you to think about me, or does thinking about me cause you to drink the bourbon.”
Coop laughed into the phone. “None of the above. This is usually how I finish my days off now. It’s peaceful to stare out at the golf course under the moonlight and pontificate about life. I gave up chasing women and hanging out in strip clubs a couple of years ago. It was unfulfilling and I was still lonely. So, I figured I could be lonely at home and not have a nasty hangover the next morning. So, you started to tell me something at dinner. You said you hadn’t been interested in dating or anything else in a year since…and then you got called away. So, what was it that changed your focus.”
Shit. Her and her big mouth. “Don’t judge or laugh at me, but here’s the tragic story of what happened a year ago. What I’m telling you is not meant to be painful so just listen. After you, I was a shell of myself for a long period of time. After medical school and during my residency, I kind of went over the ledge. I felt like I had missed out on so much that I went a little kray kray. So, our bosses are great. Let me start by saying that. They don’t care who you date or fall in love with, but they have one simple rule…no fucking in the hospital or clinic. So, one night I said screw it. I had been there for like thirty hours when I went at it with another resident. Frankly, we were really the only people we had time for. Anyway, I got a little loud and the story quickly made its way back to Lincoln. He had recently been dealing with a very stressful situation with his then girlfriend, now wife, and he was not in a good mood. He threatened us within an inch of our residency and then we both got night float for three months. After that, I was assigned to your other boss Cole for a few months, and he was going through a very difficult time, but he took me under his wing and taught me about loving myself first and foremost. So, no men, and before you ask smartass, or women in the last year. I’ve really focused on me and they offered me a job and paid off the student loans when I came to work here.”
Coop was ready to put his fist through a wall. Not at what Sarah had done, because hell he had had many of those nights trying to forget her, but at the thought of another man touching her. He worked hard to find his center and control his breathing. Gritting his teeth and finally finding his voice he said, “Well, I’m glad it all worked out for you. You seem to be doing well now.”
“I am. It’s been a long journey, but well worth it.”
Once Coop got himself back under control, he tried to suppress a laugh that was building. It reminded him of getting caught in the shower with a cleat chaser in Double-A. Eventually he lost the battle and laughed out loud.
“What the hell, Coop? I bare my soul to you and you laugh at me?”
“Sorry, Sarah. I’m not laughing at you. It just reminds me of a similar situation I found myself in, in Double-A. I kind of got caught with a girl in the showers after I got thrown out of a game. Not the same, but it forced me to re-evaluate things much like you. Unfortunately, even though I learned that lesson, I couldn’t stop my wild streak. Everyone wanted to call me Crazy Coop, but you are the only one allowed to call me Coop. So, I kept messing around, but the funny thing is brunettes were off-limits, because all they did was remind me of you.”
Sarah had been getting nauseous listening to Coop’s story. She knew she had no right to claim him, and that he would have been with other women, but it just struck her that he did these things because of her. It also dawned on her that she made a huge mistake by not giving him a chance to explain. She was fighting back tears as she thought about what she had done. Thankfully, before she had to speak again her pager went off. Relief rushed through her as she realized she could skip this part of the conversation. Gathering her voice she said, “Sorry, Coop. Duty calls again. Good night. Hope we can do this again soon.”
“Thanks for talking with me. Look, I know you have to run, but I have a quick question. I have this boss whose getting married in a few weeks and I need a date. I hate to go stag to weddings it makes me look pathetic.”
“I can’t really go as your date since I’m in the wedding, but you can be my seat mate at the reception. Does that work for you?”
“I’ll take what I can get. Hope all goes well and you get some rest. Good night.”
Coop sat on the veranda contemplating the phone call. He was sure there was something she wasn’t telling him. She seemed on the verge of tears when they finished the call. Did she have regrets about what happened? He sure as hell did. She had caused him the worst year plus of his life, and while he had regrets, they could all be erased if they ended up together. He knew he had been lying to himself and his mother. He wanted kids, but he only wanted kids with Sarah. Coop retired for the night, but he was more confused about the enigma that was Sarah Buckley than he had been in a long time.
Sarah had never been so thankful to see her relief walk into the labor and delivery area. She had done five more deliveries after her conversation with Coop. That didn’t take into account the number of patients they had seen yesterday morning and afternoon. Her eyes felt like she had the entire gulf shore behind her eyelids. After turnover, she had no idea how she was going to make it home. She thought about taking a nap in the on-call room, but decided the drive home would be worth sleeping in her own bed. She watched as her residents turned over the patients they still had and went through the complex cases from yesterday. She could tell they were exhausted, but they’d done a magnificent job and she couldn’t have been more proud. When she finally walked out of the hospital, she was greeted by the first cold day of fall which actually helped to revive her senses enough for her drive home.
Once Sarah was home, she couldn’t fall asleep. All she could think about was her conversation with Coop. His actions weren’t that of a man who had a child somewhere else. She didn’t think he’d be the type to cheat on his wife or girlfriend, but hadn’t that supposedly happened to her. Alone in the solitude of her bedroom, Sarah finally let the tears that had been threatening since last night to fall. She cried for herself, for Coop, and for her son who’d never known his father. Sarah finally cried herself to sleep.
Sarah was awoken by Harry jumping on her bed. She usually didn’t sleep that late but she was exhausted and didn’t have to work on Saturday. “Hey, Slugger. How was your day at school?”
“It was great, mom. I aced my science and math tests. Lunch was a little disappointing today, but Nana stopped at Smoothie King for a snack on the way home. Are you going to come to practice with me today?”
“Certainly. I wouldn’t miss it for the world. Let me get ready and then we’ll go.”
Sarah dragged herself out of bed, still feeling the effects of working twenty-four hours. She wasn’t twenty anymore and even though these days were far and few in between, they still drained her. Sadly, it seemed to take her longer to recover with each passing year. The shower finally woke her up, and she was ready to go and watch Harry practice. It pained her to know that he was growing up so fast, and he was becoming more and more like his father. She knew he was going to be a heartbreaker when he got older. She just hoped at some point he had a male role model to help guide him.
Practice went well, and she didn’t have to fake an emergency to get away from Harrison. So, all in all, she considered it a win. After practice, they went to Marietta Pizza Co. for dinner and then she took him to the movie.
On the drive home from the movie, Harry looked at Sarah and said, “Will I ever get to meet my dad? Don’t get me wrong, mom. I love you and Nana, but I don’t know, everyone always talks about doing things with their dad and sometimes I feel left out.”
Sarah didn’t know how to respond and had a difficult time seeing through the tears that were forming. “Harry, do you…do you resent me for not telling you about your dad?”
“No, mom. I just wonder sometimes if I look like him or if he even likes baseball.”
“Harry, I don’t know how to answer that question. Here goes, you look a lot like your father and yes, he loves baseball. He wouldn’t do anything else but play baseball. I know he would love you very much, and be very excited to watch you play baseball.”
“Why hasn’t he ever come to see me?”
Shit shit shit shit. How do I answer that question? “Harry, there are somethings that happened a long time ago, and I don’t know how to tell you this, but your father doesn’t know about you. I’m sorry. It seemed like the right decision at the time, but lately…well, lately I’ve been questioning my decision a lot. However, I know that the time will come when I tell him about you, and he’ll probably be very angry at me, but he’ll love you unconditionally. He will spoil you rotten and make your dad dreams come true.”
“When?”
“Probably after the new year. We have to talk about it, and that won’t happen until at least January. Please don’t hate me, Harry. I was young, confused, and hurt when everything happened, and then I found out about you, and it seemed like it was too late to hit the reset button.”
See glanced over at her son and saw him just staring out the window. “Harry. Harry. Did you hear anything I said?” Sarah got nothing in return. She knew she deserved the silent treatment from Harry. She deserved everything he gave her and more. She was a horrible excuse for a mother. When she parked the car after the silent last half of the ride, Harry shot out of the car like he was stealing a base and ran into the house. Sarah walked into the house to find her mother sitting in the living room with a questioning look on her face.
“What was that all about?”
“He asked about his dad on the way home, and I told him as much of the truth as I could right now. He’s pissed at me, but probably not as pissed as I am at myself. I swear, mom, if I could go back and make my decisions again I would’ve told him about being pregnant, but I can’t go back in time and change things. I did tell him that he’ll get to meet his father, but it wouldn’t be until after the new year.”
“That certainly explains why he looked so angry, and ran straight upstairs to his room. I know you’ve been having doubts lately, but you did what was right for you at the time. It’ll all work itself out in the end.”
“We’ve been communicating more and more lately. He even brought me dinner last night to the hospital and dinner for all the nurses and residents. We had a good talk about where we were at right now, and a little about the past, but nothing about us. We even talked on the phone after I got called away. That was probably the hardest, because everything he says to me screams that he didn’t cheat on me, and I over-reacted to the situation.”
“You were young and it was your first relationship. However, when I saw you two together, I got the sense that it would also be your last. I had never seen two people more perfect or in love than when I saw you two.”
Listening to her mother caused Sarah to breakdown in tears. Her mom came over to her and wrapped her arms around her to soothe the pain.
“I didn’t tell you that to upset you, but I thought you should know. I didn’t tell you ten years ago because I didn’t want my words to sway your decisions. You had to arrive at where you are today on your own. Has it been tough to stand by and watch you struggle? Hell yes, but only you can decide what’s right and when is the right time. I think you now know what’s right, but the when is what you’re still confused on. Take your time. That man isn’t going anywhere.”
Sarah sniffed away the tears. “Thanks, mom for always being there for me. For us. Funny thing is, Coop asked me to go to Cole and Marcie’s wedding with him. He was happy when I offered myself as a post-nuptials date because I was in the wedding. We agreed to not talking about the past until January, and we’ll stick to that. I just hope that by then, I know what I’m going to do, and I hope that Harry can find some forgiveness for me before then.”
“I’m sure you will. You’ve had a long two days. Why don’t you head to bed and sleep on it? Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day. Remember, we have to leave by ten for Harry’s game.”
“Good night, mom, I love you.”
“Love you too sweet girl. Sleep tight.”
About the Author
BK Harrell is former Navy physician who has had a long love of writing. He specializes in medical, military and sports romance writing. He began seriously writing while deployed to Afghanistan in 2012 and has never looked back. Whether he is teaching, serving his country, educating people about the fine art of cigars, practicing medicine or spending time with friends and family he uses his diverse background to shape the world around him through words. Currently he writes the Doctors of Atlanta Series, Sapphire Kindle World Novellas and launching in late 2018 Ashton’s Ferry a small-town romance series.
He uses his unique experiences and love of all things Atlanta, University of Georgia and sports to weave intricately detailed stories focused on Atlanta and the surrounding areas. His goal is to bring the same joy and excitement he sees in his own city to the readers and to allow them to experience the city through his eyes.
Dr. Harrell is married to his beautiful wife Erin, a proud graduate of Auburn University, which makes multiple appearances in his books, and their wonderful one son. Dr. Harrell is a native of Augusta, GA and a proud graduate of the University of Georgia, Emory University, and proud to have been a member of the first ever graduating class of Georgia Campus Philadelphia College of Osteopathic Medicine. He currently resides in the Atlanta area where he practices medicine and raises his family.
Contact Links
Purchase Link
0 comments:
Post a Comment